Two Mindful Questions That Will Change Your World

in Crafting a Legacy, Cultivating Clarity
2 Key Questions


C.S. Lewis stated, “We are what we believe.” However if this statement is true, in order for you and I to thrive in all areas of our life, it would require of us to question what we believe.

Question what we believe about…

  • God
  • Self
  • Health and wellness
  • Money
  • Success
  • Failure
  • Love
  • Sex
  • Family
  • Work
  • Play

The question I have for you today is: “Are you willing to question everything in your life?”

This past week I watched as my nine year old daughter faithfully practiced her figure skating solo performance. Monday. Tuesday. Wednesday. Thursday. Day after day, she persistently practiced her spirals, spins and jumps.

And everyday as I watched her practice I would see her begin her sessions with great enthusiasm, and then, over the course of 45-60 minutes, I would witness her enthusiasm vanish like air being let out of a balloon.

She would start strong, but often leave the ice looking, and feeling, deflated.

Why? What was causing this pattern of behavior to take place day after day?

The simple and very straight forward answer: her beliefs. Her beliefs about everything pertaining to life, and about who she is, or should be, or what she needs to do in order to be somebody; somebody worthy of respect, love and honor.

And so it is with you.

Your struggles, addictions, and the feeling of running on empty is directly connected to your beliefs; your beliefs about everything.

So let me ask you the two key questions that are shaping and determining your present state of well-being, and therefore, your future.

  1. What are you focusing on?
  2. What’s the meaning you’re giving to it?

Two simple questions that have the power to radically change your life and your relationships; they truly do! The wonderful truth about these two life-changing questions is that when you’re honest with yourself, when you’re willing to speak the unspoken, self-awareness takes root and grows.

Just before you…

  • Surf porn
  • Engage in an argument with your wife
  • Pour yourself another drink
  • Work more overtime
  • Buy another expensive toy

ask yourself:

  1. What am I focusing my attention on right now?
  2. What’s the meaning I’m giving to it?

Meaning is shaped by your beliefs; and your beliefs are always influencing what you choose to focus your attention on.

My daughter, unaware to her, has beliefs that are shaping the quality and results of her practice time on the ice. Amber believes she needs to execute every jump flawlessly right now in order to win, and trust me, she wants to win. And then, as she struggles with a particular jump, her beliefs silently feed those voices in her head; the voices that tell her she isn’t good enough. And this becomes a feedback loop, a cycle, a pattern that will play out time and time again if left unchecked.

If you were at the rink with me, you would have witnessed her beliefs in action too. Why? Because we physically do our emotions. Our emotional state is constantly being influenced by what we focus our attention on and the meaning we give to it. And this whole pattern is shaped and influenced by our beliefs about everything.

Today’s Unitas Project:

  • Be a detective. Put on Sherlock Holmes hat, smoke his pipe and become curious to why you do what you do. Sit down with a notebook and pen and explore a past event in your life by asking yourself the two key questions: 1. What was I focusing on? 2. What was the meaning I was giving to it? 3. And now ask yourself a third question: What did I do?
  • Want some extra work? Next time you watch a movie or a tv show, observe the main characters actions in a particular scene and analyze their behavior through the lens of the two key questions. Remember: Their behaviors (the outcome) are always being shaped by what they choose to focus on and the meaning they give to it.

Until next time…

Be You. Be Unitas.




photo is from Shutterstock